


Don't Disrespect Your Father

by Bookworm39



Series: RvB Bingo Wars (2017) [1]
Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Canon-typical language, Fluff, Gen, RvB Bingo Wars, Short & Sweet, Team as Family, Team: Medic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-23
Updated: 2018-01-23
Packaged: 2019-03-08 17:33:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13463121
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bookworm39/pseuds/Bookworm39
Summary: First of three entries I did for the Red Vs Blue Bingo Wars last year, ft. Blue Team shenanigans.





	Don't Disrespect Your Father

**Author's Note:**

> (Generic copy-pasted message incoming)  
> Hello! I did a couple of fandom events for rvbficwars.tumblr.com, and thought it was time I moved those 'fics over here! Just keep in mind that, between being older and being written under a slight time crunch, these may not be as high-quality as some of my other works.

“No. In fact, fuck no.”

“Oh, come on, Church!”

“There is no way in hell I’m going to let you guys pull something like that.”

It was weird seeing Tucker and Caboose do something in unison, but the “Awwww…” and pout combinations were perfectly synced. Wash and Carolina were sitting to the side, watching the three argue over-what was it? Wash wasn’t even sure. Didn’t think he wanted to know.

“Church, you are a terrible dad.”

Everyone in the room turned to face Caboose. “…What?” Church asked flatly.

“You’re not a nice dad. There, I said it.” Caboose nodded sagely at his own comment. “Please don’t ground me.”

“Yeah, now that you mention it…” Tucker scratched the back of his head and continued, “You _are_ kinda like the asshole dad of the group.”

“Really?” Church looked around the room. “If anything, that sounds more like Wash.”

“Hey!”

“No, he’s the mom.”

Tucker doubled over laughing, and all Wash could get out was an indignant _“What?!”_

“Hmmm… Yeah, I see your point, buddy.” Church grinned. “ _Clearly_ Wash is the mom.”

Carolina was trying to hide her own giggles. “Well, now I feel left out.”

“Nonono, you’re the cool aunt.” Church pointed at the remaining two blues in turn, saying, “Tucker is the asshole, rebellious older one, and Caboose is the overly-friendly, dumber younger one.”

Tucker, who was now laying on the floor in a fit of giggles, yelled, “It’s not a phase, Mom!”

“Go to your room.” Wash rested his elbow on the table and hid his face in the crook, muttering, “Jesus fucking Christ, what have you got me into.”

“And Sister is the sister.” There was a second of quiet, then Caboose added, “Duh.”

“More like the weird adopted sister. Sorta like the weird adopted mom and the terrifying adopted aunt.”

“Shut up, or I’ll leave you to deal with these children by yourself.”

“Alright, alright.” Church looked down at the floor, where Caboose was now sitting next to Tucker. “See, boys? Terrifying aunt.”


End file.
